Peeing your pants.

When you are pregnant no one tells you to be careful of peeing a little bit every time you cough or sneeze. No, you have to figure it out yourself when you start putting back-up underwear and pads in your purse and then weekly throw a pair or two away because you aren't home to throw them in the washer. And now...I swear for Jesus that I pulled my groin muscles sneezing and squeezing my legs shut to stop it from happening, over and over again. I do kegels all day with this in mind and it doesn't always matter, but it also doesn't help that I have awful allergies to keep this cycling.

Last week I was in my car, that was still parked in the driveway and running late for work as usual. I sneezed 13 times in a row. Imagine what that did to me, or you might not want to.  I swore like a madwoman and went back in the house to change with watery eyes and wet pants.

Not only did my storming into the house and banging drawers awaken my husband, but he knew exactly what happened by which drawer I pulled from. He laughed at me with one eye open and half asleep and when he asked me to calm down and be quiet, I almost punched him.

Are you effing kidding me? He doesn't pee his pants sneezing AND he gets to stay in bed another two hours every day! Seriously, do not say a word.

But fine, it was funny later.

TMI? I don't care. The mommas know what I am talking about and the rest of you have no idea what we really go through. When I feel my baby boy kicking me and moving around, I know that I would pee my pants a million times over to keep this little man growing, and I can't wait to meet him.