Trying.

I tend to look at the darker side of things. I'm sure you've noticed.

Why are there so many more words to use when writing about sadness, torment, falseness?  Those words alone are prime examples of my recent vocabulary.

Is happiness just much easier to visually express that I don't find as deep of a need to express it in writing? Is it too gag-y to express true love or joy and tall tales of frolicking in fields?  It might be. Just know that I do feel those things too, despite what I write, there is a lighter side.

I think happiness is so much easier to relate to, for everyone, that you just don't need the words to understand it.

You probably know what it feels like to love someone so much that you just need to reach out and touch them, hug them, kiss a shoulder or feel your heart flutter.

You know what it feels like to feel a breeze around you as you tilt your face towards the sunshine and breathe the fresh air.

You know what it feels like to be genuinely touched by someone's thoughtfulness in a gift, in a card, in a phone call.

You've had that moment when sitting with friends through a whole evening of laughter and secret stories.

And then there is sadness, empty pits of despair that you can't climb out of when you want to. You tumble, you cry, and you hide and your support system may not know what to do with you.  You have to find your own expression... and mine comes from finding the words that piece together the fragments of my life that I've momentarily forgotten in the blackness.